Recently I realised that I could write from my heart but could only speak from my intellect. I attribute this to the fact that the two languages in which my intellectual life is expressed - English and French - are adopted, colonial languages.
In Body-Scan, Benoît and I speak, attempting to find a language that comes out of the liquid state, the energetic state of the body. Once Benoît gave me a note that my words were too "hard", too intellectual. I don't know if I have been able to surmount this.
I marvel at the ability in other people for sound and words to form out of the beating of the heart, the rushing of blood.
In close proximity with the beloved, I find myself often mute, the pressure of my heart pumping relieved simply by the efficient passing of information through skin, through the meeting of fluids, the opening of chakras.
No need for words.
I speak merely to remind myself that I can.