Wednesday, January 14, 2015


I am currently in the process of researching the porousness of my body, the porousness of the combined body of me and my lover.
It's all going tremblingly well.

Somehow, this is related to building a dance machine that is going to install the notion of dancing with, instead of dancing for, an audience.

Somehow, this is related to learning how to dominate my submissive.

Somehow, this is related to finding my whole voice.

Somehow, this is related to making a good ceremony.

the inhale

I recently felt the experience of the inhale as an expressive act.
I knew this before. But only as an idea. This time, I felt it.

It feels like I am standing in some kind of paradoxical buoyant quicksand.

Now I have to learn to trust it.

Monday, January 12, 2015

my fucking tongue

I have had to learn to fight for my space
my right to speak
my right to be heard
my right to be seen the way I want to be seen.
All this fighting.
I long to have space to be generous.
I long to have enough voice to say kind things,
not just fighting things.

I want to find words to love with
Words to fuck with.

Words to order my sex slave with.